You are currently browsing the daily archive for February 14th, 2008.
If my son continues to crack me up like he did this morning.
Ok, here’s how it started: I get him up and he was sorta grumpy. That quickly faded, because he for some reason started quoting lines from Norbit. Now, I have never seen this movie, but he has four times. Thrice at his friends’ house, once at my parents’ house. So, apparently there is a scene in the movie where the large woman is at the pool and someone asks her if she’s wearing panties?? So, the kidlet starts impersonating the large woman by walking around with his hands on his hips saying “Of course I am wearing panties” in this voice that nearly made me die with laughter. Then he told me about a skinny girl at the pool that the large woman told to “go to the concession stand and get some chocolate bars” because she was too skinny. OMG, I was laughing so hard. He kills me.
Oh, but it didn’t end there. It continued. As I was downstairs gathering up our wares to take with us, he’s upstairs yelling “Of course I am wearing panties” and I am downstairs doubled over with laughter…oy.
We leave the house and are on our way to the Giant. He said to me that one of his friends in school considers practicing keyboards and math facts a good time. The kidlet said he thought that was a little nerdy. I told him that maybe that kid thinks what he does for a good time is nerdy too. That only got him rolling singing the “White & Nerdy” song. He doesn’t know all the lyrics, so he was making them up as he went along. I nearly veered into a pole when he shouted “Oh my God I’m white and nerdy, holy heck I’m white and nerdy, what’s the deal, I’m white and nerdy”! Seriously, he was just on a roll. By this time, I was crying…my mascara was running, I kid you not. He looks at me right before we get out of the car and says “We are going to Hell, aren’t we mom?” LMAO!
We went into the Giant and were perusing the frozen food lunch thingies and he starts laughing…hard. I turn around and see this:
OMG. He had me convinced that this monkey had a penis. I lost it right there in the frozen foods aisle. He said to me, “Mom, can you BELIEVE that they made something like this??? Who would want to play with this???” By the way, it was a dog toy…not a toy for a child. What the hell it was doing in the frozen foods aisle, I am still trying to figure out. I was doubled over and laughing so hard, that the remainder of my mascara was now running down my cheeks.
Now, maybe you are thinking, that’s disgusting! However, I am very open with my son. We have a rule that he can ask me ANYTHING and I will talk openly talk to him about it. Let me tell you what, he asks me ANYTHING. I am glad though, I would rather he hear it from me. It’s just the way it is with us.
We went to check out and there was someone in the self-check area that smelled, well, foul. It smelled like someone crapped themselves. I prayed to God that the kidlet’s nose was clogged but it wasn’t. I knew IMMEDIATELY when he smelled it by the look on his face. I had to turn away from him because I would’ve lost it again. We got checked out and left.
As we got in the car, he looked at me and said “DID YOU SMELL THAT”??? I told him I did. He said “OMG, mom, I think someone needs to go check their pants”! Indeed. He also told me that he thought he was going to throw up it was so bad.
As we left the parking lot, he started singing his “White and Nerdy” song again…it’s been stuck in my head ever since…
Good times, good times.
